In Memory of Sadie

I rode my bike to Johnson Avenue
And stopped to visit your grave.
The ficus tree is getting bigger every year
Nourished by your essence.

You were such a good listener.
I could tell you my deepest secrets,
Bare my inner soul, reveal my fears
And no one else would ever know.

I need you to comfort me once more
And snuggle up to my ear.
Look into my eyes and turn the pain
Into just another chew toy.

You were an eighteen pound female
Terrier with an attitude and could always
Make me laugh when I was down.
Thanks for the smiles once again my old friend.

Top of Page

Rock Bottom

The Doctor said you were sitting on a fence
Somewhere between here and rock bottom,
But you wouldn't go to the halfway house
Where help was offered and had to be earned.

I was a fool to bring you home and give you
Yet another chance to stop drinking for good.
All you had to do was stay sober, find a job
And go to ninety meetings in ninety days.

It took three days for the spin cycle to kick in
And a full load of clean sheets was thrown
From a whirling barrel onto the dirty floor.
I don't think I can fix the machine this time.

Four months ago we said goodbye to my family
And got ready to head south for the winter.
I hope this parting memory will haunt and
Inspire you for the rest of your life.

My three-year-old granddaughter
Stood at the top of the stairs
With tears streaming down her face and asked,
"Where are you going, Auntie 'M'?"

You gave her such a big hug full of love
And told her that you weren't going forever.
But the quicksand already held your leg,
Just waiting for you to struggle and sink.

Waiting to pull you down to rock bottom.

Top of Page

The Demons Inside

The demons inside pull you closer
To despair and depression
Curling you up in a ball.

Loving, caring and sharing are on hold
While you fight for your life
In the darkness.

The bedroom is your den lined with
Comforting duvets and pillows
And the TV keeps you comatose

I can't go there to help you
Because they won't let me in
With my sword and my senses.

My rage and strong will are useless
And can't fight this shadow
That haunts and destroys you.

The salty air and ocean breeze
Are just outside the door
Waiting for your footprints on the beach.

Can you come out and play?

Top of Page

Road Kill

I called and they put me right through to your room
But I did not want to talk to you.
You have only been in de-tox for two days
And I just needed to see if you were okay. 

Your lunch was getting cold so I hung up
Wondering if you were only driving
An eighteen-wheeler on the road to sobriety
That would run me over like road kill.

Top of Page

Hunted Creatures

My chair in the forest is a rock.
My footstool is a log.
Nothing moves but the wind.

The eyes of every hunted creature are upon me
But I only sense their presence
As they silently move away.

Today I am not a hunter.
The Ruffed Grouse can fly freely
In the cedar trees and pines

Solitude is all I want.
The deer can run and
Tattletale Blue Jays can be silent.

Yellow rays begin to break
Through heavy mist and
Banish the chill from my heart.

There is no room in my mind
For anything but the smell
Of wood and water.

A tear is hardly noticed
Falling to the ground
Joining the drops of dew.

Beating wings softly land
On the leaves in front of me
And three startled eyes meet.

We make no sound.
We do not move.
Frozen  -  like photographs of you.

Top of Page

All material protected by copyright (C) BRM